Love shouldn’t hurt...

In the photo below on the right, we can see the back of two T-shirts. One T-shirt says, “Love Shouldn’t Hurt.” The other T-shirt says “Stronger Together” and promotes Safeplace and the Purple Mile Walk (where this photo was taken). Safeplace sold their shirts to raise awareness and funds, while the Hamilton High School Junior Civitan Club sold the other T-shirts to also raise awareness and funds for local domestic violence survivors.
Another photo, shown below on the left, was taken at the walk by Makahla Holloway. Her mother, Marion County District Attorney’s Office Victims Service Officer Gena Holloway, is holding the banner on the left. Safeplace Outreach Program Manager Kim Smith is holding up the other side of the banner.
We reached out to both of these ladies and asked them to participate in a special column to run the week of Valentine’s Day. Other information provided here comes from staff coverage of the Purple Mile Walk.

Domestic violence:
When love should never hurt
“Domestic violence is a silent crisis affecting millions of people every year,” Gena said. “It does not discriminate by age, gender, race, education or income. It happens in homes, apartments and neighborhoods everywhere — often hidden behind closed doors and quiet suffering.
“At its core, domestic violence is about power and control. It can take many forms, including physical abuse, emotional manipulation, verbal attacks, sexual violence, financial control and isolation from family and friends. While bruises and broken bones may heal, the emotional scars can last a lifetime.
“Many victims stay in abusive relationships for complex reasons. Fear, financial dependence, concern for children, cultural expectations, shame or hope the abuser will change can all make leaving feel impossible. Abusers often promise change, apologize or temporarily improve their behavior — creating a painful cycle that keeps victims trapped.
“One of the most damaging myths about domestic violence is that it only involves physical harm. In reality, emotional abuse can be just as devastating. Constant criticism, threats, gaslighting and control over daily activities slowly erode a person’s confidence and sense of self-worth.
“No one deserves to be abused. Love should never hurt. Healthy relationships are built on respect, trust, communication and equality — not fear.
“Victim service officers and organizations like Safeplace play a critical role in helping survivors reclaim their lives. These professionals provide crisis intervention, safety planning, court advocacy, counseling referrals and connections to shelters and community resources. Their work ensures victims are not forced to navigate trauma alone.
“If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Reaching out can feel overwhelming, but even one conversation can be the first step toward safety and healing.
“As a community, we all have a role to play. Believe survivors. Offer support without judgment. Share resources. Speak up when something doesn’t seem right. Awareness saves lives.
“Domestic violence thrives in silence — but together, we can break that silence and create safer futures for everyone.”

Purple Mile Walk
Kim began her comments by noting Safeplace, which serves five other counties besides Marion County, had not held an event like the Purple Mile Walk in the last 15 years.
“We are bringing these walks back to get community support, bring awareness

to the community, raise awareness about Safeplace services and as a way to connect to all of our community members,” she said.
Regarding the walk held in Marion County, Kim explained, “There was way more participation there than at our other walks. They have an established task force there, and they are very active in the community.”
Before the walk, moving speeches were given by law enforcement, victims’ services officials and Safeplace personnel, as well as by survivors and their families. There was also a meaningful performance by the dance company, “Pure Movement,” of Hamilton.
Other local groups participating included the Marion County Domestic Violence Task Force and the Hamilton High School Junior Civitan Club. Several families also attended together, bringing children with them to the event.

Heightened holiday danger
Returning to the subject of domestic violence, Kim noted one in three women and one in five men are affected by intimate partner abuse.
“One of the reasons we step in and help is because victims are 70 percent more likely to die during the first year after they leave their abuser,” she said. “Abuse is about power and control. So, once the abuser loses control, the situation escalates.”
If you are considering leaving an abuser, please contact Safeplace first.
“You can meet with Safeplace to get a safety plan,” Kim said. “It’s best to have a plan before you leave, because it can help alleviate some of the dangers victims face during the separation process.”
Kim also shared that holidays, which include Valentine’s Day, can be filled with tension, stress and pressure, which always heightens abuse, making it more prevalent than at other times of the year.

More information
The 24-hour Safeplace helpline numbers are 256-767-6210 and 800-550-9215. The national hotline is 800-799-7233 or text BEGIN to 88788.
Safeplace offers the Peace Program for men and Harmony Classes for women. These classes are usually court mandated after offenders are charged with domestic violence, but can also be taken on a voluntary basis.
Safeplace depends on donations to help survivors and their children. You can reach out to make a donation by contacting them at 256-767-3076 or via email at sells@nwalsafeplace.org or visit Safeplaceal.org.
The Marion County Domestic Violence Task Force is a supporter of Safeplace, helping to raise funds and awareness, as well as helping with the numerous financial and physical efforts which make it possible to have a Safeplace Shelter located within the county.
For more information on the task force, you can contact co-chair Kim Lolley at 205-921-6019 or visit their Facebook page at MarionCo DVTF. The next project for the task force will be its annual supply drive for Safeplace. Please watch for more information soon on the supply drive.

(Editor’s note: We sincerely hope everyone has a lovely and safe Valentine’s Day. For our parting words, let’s use some verses shared recently in a devotional taken from Romans 12:9-10 (GW): “Love sincerely... Hold on to what is good. Be devoted to each other like a loving family. Excel in showing respect for each other.”)